Break my heart…. The conclusion of Acts

I have to apologize to all of you.  While I have been keeping up with my reading in Acts, I have not been posting.  Life gets hard sometimes.  I’m not talking about tragedies or pull the carpet out from under you hard, I am talking about day to day, busy, I don’t have time to use the bathroom hard!  I know you can all relate.  The past couple of weeks have been tough in our family.  I have felt like we were all running in separate directions with a resistance band connecting us to each other in the center.  Kind of like a wheel with spokes going out in all directions.  The problem was that with a resistance band, one person can give a little more when the other takes a little more, but in this case, we were all pulling until it snapped.  And that snap is what brought us all back together!  As difficult and emotional as a snap can be, because of over-stress, too busy, not seeing enough of your family, etc, sometimes it’s just what you need to wake you up and get you back on track.  Well, that’s where I was the past few weeks, friends.  Trying to get back to sanity!

Last night, my family went to the Big Daddy Weave concert.  It was a fantastic event, a first concert for both of my girls, too.  Big Daddy Weave is a Christian rock band and they were amazing with both their music and their stories and connections. One thing really stuck out for me and that is what I would like to share with you today as we conclude Acts.  It was Big Daddy’s first song of the evening.  We had already listened to Tim Timmons and Group 1 Crew.  Big Daddy opened with Love Come to Life.  I have heard this song many times and I like.  However, last night, I heard a line I never paid attention to before.

Why don’t You break my heart ’til it moves my hands and feet 

WOW!  Break my heart ’til it moves my hands and feet.  Yes, I needed to repeat that for you.  I can’t get it out of my head.  God uses our tragedies, our turmoil, life’s most agonizing moments to move us into His Word.  To move us into His mission.  To move us into Him.  Did you get that?

When tragedy strikes, we have two choices.  We can move toward God and seek comfort or we can move away from God and find anger and bitterness.  It is our choice.

My heart was broken almost 8 years ago when my baby boy died of cancer.  He was diagnosed just 1 month before he died.  We didn’t know he was sick and we didn’t have time to prepare ourselves for this upheaval of our life.  Broken heart?  As I write this that doesn’t even seem to do it justice.  It felt more like a broken, bleeding heart with a rusty knife sticking out.  And every so often, someone would come and twist it just enough to pour out my emotions all over again.  Yes, this was my low part of life and this is the cross I carry everyday.

God used this awful, terrible, heart-wrenching situation to move my hands and feet.  He used this to open my eyes to Him and to show me how to reach out to others.  And since I have started listening to God, really listening to Him, I have not stopped reading, learning, sharing and reaching out to others in His name.

Big Daddy Weave – Love Comes to Life

Paul and the other followers of Christ in those early days of the church experiences much of the same heart break and boy did it move their hands and feet!  They experienced persecution, blindness, murder among their friends, fear, and more. Did this scare them from their mission?  Did it stop them from “moving their hands and feet”?  No!  It encouraged them even more and it showed them how to share God’s Word with more and more people, including the Gentiles.  Paul and the other believers did not break under their tragedy and turmoil.  No, they leaned on God when they were not strong enough, they looked to God when they didn’t have answers, they relied on God in all situations.

So, as I was pondering all of this last night and into this morning, I couldn’t help thinking, why would God want to use our heart break instead of our glorious days to move us?  Well, it seemed pretty clear to me when I really was honest with myself in my thoughts.  Think of the last really nice day you had.  I’m not talking about  something big, like a wedding or child birth or something like that, I’m talking about a normal, nice day.

Ok, got it in your head?

Did you remember God this day?  Did you get down on your knees to  praise  Him and worship Him and thank Him for this day?  Did this day make you feel like you needed to go out and do something?  Did it move your hands and feet for the Lord?  Now, think of a big day, like a wedding or child birth.  I bet you remembered to thank God!  I know I did.  But what about the next day?  Did it move you to go out and do His work?  I can’t say that it did for me.  I was so wrapped up in my perfect, little world that I wasn’t thinking about anything else.

Do you see why God uses our heart break?  We are vulnerable.  We are crying out to him for help.  We are desperate.  Our “normal” way of life is not cutting it for us right now and we don’t know what to do.  That’s when God can step in and move us!  And if we let him… WOW!  What a changed life we will experience!

I’d love to hear about a heart break in your life, whether you let it move you or fought against it.  Are you ready to embrace God through your heart break today?  Surrender to it and see what happens.

God bless you all!  It’s good to be back!

Tomorrow we begin the Book of Hebrews.
Saturday – Acts 28
Sunday – Hebrews 1
Monday – Reflection
Tuesday – Praises and Petitions
Wednesday – Hebrews 2
Thursday – Hebrews 3
Friday – Hebrews 4


One thought on “Break my heart…. The conclusion of Acts

  1. Stephanie says:

    Erin, I love the way that you say that our hearts need to break in order to get our feet & hands moving. It is so true that it is often during the difficulties that we either move towards God or away from Him. I am learning to be thankful every day for whatever I encounter – good or bad. I want to praise God for the challenges, but it is still difficult some days. Thanks for your honesty and sharing.

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